I generally don't look forward to going to sleep at night. No matter what kind a day I have had, when the lights go out at night, my mind just goes mad. This phenomenon is relatively new to me. My main thoughts are about why am I who I am. Why am I not a novelist? An actor? An engineer? What do I want to be when I grow up? Why did I not finish college? All these thoughts just flood my mind when the lights go out.
I watched Inside the Actor's Studio with Matt Damon on You Tube last night. He had such a clear idea from a young age what he was going to be in his future. Amazing! He had an idea an idea at a young age and ran with it. It didn't fall into his lap! He set his course with the help of his parents and reached his destination.
Where is my plan? Why did I never had it? How much smarter is Matt Damon than me? Why can't I find my destination? Or start my journey?
These are the type of thoughts that are becoming my bedtime routine. Can I still find my niche in life? Other than a husband and father, what am I going to be when I grow up? Why am I where I am in life? Am I smart enough to write? HELP!
Live in the now.
C'est finis
Ron
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